Mrs. Hamilton (Louan Gideon; 1955-2014) is the villainess from "The Millennium," the antepenultimate episode of Seinfeld's eighth season (airdate May 1, 1997). She is the evil stepmother of Jerry's girlfriend, Valerie.
After a few dates with Valerie, Jerry is elated to discover that he has made the #1 spot on Valerie's speed dial. This angers Mrs. Hamilton, who had spent 13 years attempting to obtain that same spot. While Jerry is waiting for Valerie, Mrs. Hamilton enters Jerry's car and voices her jealousy of Jerry's speed dial elevation, warning him to stay away from Valerie's phone. After discovering that her stepmother got to Jerry, Valerie removed her from her speed dial completely.
Later in the episode, the evil Mrs. Hamilton invited Jerry to her home, under the pretense that Valerie would also be there. She began seducing Jerry (which included calling him "Jerome") and decided to put him on her own speed dial, which led to Jerry realizing that Valerie wasn't coming over. Jerry later ran off, while Mrs. Hamilton gave an evil laugh and watched. The next day, Mrs. Hamilton phones Jerry while he's talking to Valerie, who knows about Jerry being on her stepmother's speed dial. The villainess informed Jerry that she won't remove him from her speed dial unless she's on Valerie's. Valerie agrees, but Mrs. Hamilton secretly placed Jerry on one of her emergency contacts, reneging on her end of the promise.
Mrs. Hamilton's deception backfired on her at episode's end, when she becomes ill after eating salsa that was contaminated by dessicant (which was accidentally dropped in by Kramer). When Valerie pressed used her stepmother's speed dial to call poison control, she got Jerry, revealing Mrs. Hamilton's lie. Mrs. Hamilton's fate afterwards is not revealed.
Quotes[]
- "It's taken me 13 years to climb up to the top of that speed dial, and I don't intend to lose my spot to you! You are to stay away from that phone!" (Mrs. Hamilton's threat to Jerry)
Trivia[]
- Louan Gideon is best remembered for playing recurring main villainess Danielle Atron on Nickelodeon's The Secret World of Alex Mack.